The Break Up

I could sense that something was wrong. I looked at him in the eyes, and insisted him to tell me. I even begged him a couple of times. He stared directly into my eyes and mumbled something...something that I didn't want to hear, ever. I was shocked and deeply hurt at the same time. I asked him why? Why did you do this to me? He just kept quiet.

Oh shit...is the breaking up cycle repeating itself? I thought to myself.

After gaining enough courage...I asked him if he fell in love with my best friend. I had to clasp both hands on my face to hear the answer. My heart pounded so fast that I thought I was going to die.

Yes was his answer. "He gave me more attention that I needed" he added.

I choked. I demanded him to stop the car. I started walking back home. I wished he could run after me and tell me that it was not true. But he didn't.

Why? Why? Just barely after one year and we're breaking up? I thought we could live together for a long, long time...or so I thought?

I choked more, until I could feel myself bounced back into reality. As I felt my hand grasped tightly to the blanket, I let out a big sigh of relief. But still, it was the ugliest, most real nightmare that I have ever experienced.

After dragging myself up, the first thing I did was to call Brian and tell him I love him.

I don't know what will ever happen to me without him. But one thing for sure, I don't want to lose him. Not now, not in many, many years to come.